


all that

by idolrapper



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe - High School, Coming of Age, Egg Baby Project, F/F, Sexual Humor, Swearing, Underage Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-03
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-03 16:53:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15823059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idolrapper/pseuds/idolrapper
Summary: “Whatever, bitch,” Heejin says, shoving Jeno into the doorframe so she can reach the bannister before him, “I’ve already accepted my fate, anyways!” she yells as she slides down the stairs, “I’m gonna win her over!”Jeno leans over the railing, holding a palm to his ear. “Huh, what was that? I thought I just heard Heejin Jeon making a joke?”(Or: Hyunjin is the captain of the school's soccer team. Heejin is hopelessly in love. Somehow they have to raise an egg baby together.)





	all that

**Author's Note:**

> ADDITIONAL WARNINGS: brief suicidal ideation (just heejin being dramatic), another emphasis on inappropriate humour, swearing etc. heejin is a hot mess.
> 
> this is very loosely inspired by the film edge of seventeen (mainly heejin's character and her interactions with kim lip, her art teacher/confidante)! kim lip + 97z are aged up to around late 20s or early 30s, doesn't really matter. for convenience's sake 00/01z are all the same age and in senior year together, and yeojin is in the grade below.
> 
> i had heaps of fun writing this (at least until it got 10x longer than i had planned), i started getting into loona this year and all the members quickly became a big muse for me ♡ also sorry (?) for all the nct in this, the heejen agenda is strong...

Heejin tosses her backpack onto the floor in front of Mrs Kim-Oakley’s desk in the art classroom, plonking down into the velvet armchair and throwing her legs over the side. Mrs Kim-Oakley (Mrs K.O for short) raises an eyebrow at Heejin, taking off her glasses and letting them dangle by their chain around her neck. Her blonde hair is in its usual tangled mess, an orange leaf stuck near her ear. Heejin’s eye twitches at it. But she ignores it, taking a deep breath—

“Mrs K.O - Jungeun - can I call you that? So, Jungeun, here’s the deal: I am gonna kill myself,” Heejin says, all in that one breath. She’d been leaning closer and closer with every word and she has to grab the edge of Jungeun’s desk to stop herself from tipping over. “Just thought you should know. As an adult.”

“Okay then,” Jungeun says, perching her glasses back on her nose and picking up her sandwich again. “Thank you for letting me know.”

“I—” Heejin sputters, “Is that it? Aren’t you gonna send me to the counsellor or something? Put me on suicide watch?”

Jungeun shrugs a little. “Why would I do that? I was just in the middle of writing my own suicide note actually.” She picks up a blank notepad in her other hand. “Dear world, I am tired of my life. I’m tired of teenagers barging into my room when I’m trying to savour what little alone time I have in this godforsaken hellscape of a school, and whining about their problems as if I give a shit. I just want to eat my sandwich, God, just let me eat my sandwich on the other side. Peace out, fuckers, K.O.”

“You could’ve at least pretended to have been worried,” Heejin sniffs, her palms starting to get sort of clammy with embarrassment. “Okay, I’m not gonna kill myself but I _am_ feeling like absolute poo right now. Just a giant stinking pile of depression poo, on top of a—”

Jungeun’s long dramatic sigh cuts her off, and the screech of her chair being pushed back makes Heejin wince. “Alright, come on. You can talk while you paint.”

 

 

“Where were you at lunch?” Chaewon whispers, when Heejin barrels into AP Calc just in the nick of time. Chaewon watches Heejin wet her fingers with her tongue and rub furiously at the paint splatter on her forearm, eyes still sparkling with a sweet smile. “With Mrs K.O again, huh?”

“Chaewon, if you don’t mind, could you sound a tad more judgemental when you say that?” Heejin gives up on getting rid of the paint, flopping onto her desk. She huffs a breath onto the strand of wavy hair that falls into her eyes, but like with the paint, it achieves nothing. 

Chaewon’s focused on cutting out a piece of washi tape for her unsettlingly perfect bullet journal thingy, but she tuts, “Why would I judge you?”

“Spending my lunch with a teacher? Could I be any more of a fucking dork?” Heejin says, sitting up again when the Calc teacher walks in. 

“Mrs K.O’s a super cool teacher though, everyone thinks so,” Chaewon says matter-of-factly. She shuts her journal, reaching down into her backpack to take out her Calc textbook. “And so what? Sometimes I—” she leans sideways, lowering her voice even further, “ _you know_ with Olivia from Class B to let off some steam. Everyone has their vices.” 

Heejin’s eyebrows shoot up, and she can’t help but sound mildly impressed when she hisses, “You’ve banged Olivia? Like leather jacket-wearing Olivia? Rides a motorcycle to school Olivia?” 

“ _Heejin_ ,” Chaewon gasps, “I have _not_. I meant weed. We smoke weed. It’s not really a big deal,” she straightens up, sniffing, “It’s going to be legalized here soon, you know.” 

“Invite me next time, biatch,” Heejin says, knocking her Doc Marten against Chaewon’s polished brogue. “I’ve always wanted to get high.”

Chaewon turns a shiny pink, her eyes shifty as she turns her attention to the teacher clearing his throat to start the lesson. “Ummm, okay. I’ll ask Olivia if it’s cool.”

Heejin snorts. “If you wanna make out, I promise I won’t look.”

“ _Heejin_.”

 

 

The first time Heejin met Hyunjin she was fifteen and sitting in on her stepbrother’s soccer practice. She’d made herself comfy in the bleachers, sifting through her French notes from earlier that day to kill time before Jaehyun drove them home. 

“Hey,” came a soft voice from below her. Heejin glanced down and her eyes nearly fell out of her skull. The girl was pretty and doe-eyed, with long inky hair that was swept up into a ponytail, and when Heejin’s gaze darted lower, a pair of strong tan thighs in these skimpy athletic shorts. 

Heejin gulped, throat dry. “What’s up,” she said, pushing her thick glasses back up with a knuckle. 

“I don’t know, it’s just - do you mind if I sit?” she asked, sinking onto the bench immediately below Heejin before she’d even finished asking. “I’m just trying to psych myself up to go speak to the coach.” 

“Oh,” Heejin said, “Why?”

The girl peeled her eyes away from the pitch, looking back up at Heejin, mouth set in a small, sad smile. “I’m new here. I wanna join the soccer team but it’s,” she continued drily, “ _boys only_ according to the principal.”

“Ah,” Heejin said, words failing her. She wanted to say something smart, something that would let the girl know how unjust and sexist her dilemma was but all she could manage was an unimpressive, “That sucks.” 

The girl hopped up a second later, hands curled up in determined little fists. “I got this. I’m gonna plead my case and I’m gonna win. Thanks for talking to me,” she told Heejin, “I’m Hyunjin, by the way.” 

“Good luck,” Heejin called out as Hyunjin jumped over the short railing. She gave Hyunjin a salute, and then immediately mouthed a pained _what the fuck_ at herself when Hyunjin started walking across the pitch. She watched Hyunjin talking to the coach, shrugging at Jaehyun when he gave her a questioning look from afar. She watched the coach burst into laughter and wrap an arm around Jaehyun’s shoulders, jostling him, and she didn’t know what he was saying but she knew it was absolute bullcrap. 

Hyunjin left the pitch in defeat, sticking out her tongue and shooting a thumbs down at Heejin. 

Heejin was in love.

 

 

Jungeun sets up a sea glass vase on the centre table, a few sprigs of baby’s breath sticking out of it, and pulls up a stool in front of the easel next to Heejin’s. Heejin has already laid out the oil paints for them to share, pouring out a small cup of turp next to the palette.

“You won’t _believe_ what Miss Jo is making us do in Home Ec,” Heejin starts to explain, mixing a blue and green.

“I’m certain I will,” Jungeun says. She dabs her paintbrush into Heejin’s mixture, before facing her prepped canvas. The midday sun strikes the sea glass in a way that makes turquoise light shimmer across the 9th grade charcoal drawings stuck up on the opposite wall, like an ocean wave breaking against the shore. “Have I told you about the time my wife invited Haseul to our summer soirée - ah, sorry, sorry, my bad, continue your story, Heejin.” 

(Heejin has only met Jungeun’s wife a couple times, when she’s come to pick Jungeun up in her chauffeured Rolls Royce. Heejin had been but one student in a sea of many loitering outside the school, either waiting for the bus or a parent. Like everyone else, her jaw dropped when Jinsol Oakley, infamously eccentric Korean-English countess and multimillionaire, stepped out of the car, flipping her long blonde hair over her shoulder and pushing a pair of cat-eye sunglasses over her hazel eyes. She was wearing a pantsuit in tartan print, and the way her heels clacked against the pavement could be heard from a mile away in the awed silence. Jinsol had paused at the entrance, leaning over the steps to take a marker Jisung Park was holding out to her. She autographed his arm, ruffled his hair, and then addressed the student body: “Toodle-oo, everyone, my dear wife awaits me. Would anyone care to show me where her office is?” 

Heejin had stuck her hand straight up. She’d like to cite two years of Academic Decathlon for her lightning speed.

They didn’t converse much as Heejin led her down the corridor, but Jinsol had complimented her tortoiseshell glasses in that sexy London accent of hers and pinched her cheek when it turned pink, and as soon as they were outside the art room, Heejin ran away before Jungeun spotted her and furthered her embarrassment. 

The next time Heejin met Jinsol, she’d interrupted an after school painting sesh earlier this year, with Chaewon and a kid called Renjun. Jinsol pinched Heejin’s cheek again and told her that it was a shame she had gone and gotten lenses instead of wearing her glasses.) 

“I’m still holding you to that story though,” Heejin says. Her tongue sticks out a little as her brush works across the canvas, a small eight incher today. “I’m trying to build up my blackmail portfolio on all the teachers.” 

“What do you have on me?” Jungeun asks. 

“Well, Mr Nakamoto _loves_ dishing the dirt on you and your wife in return for me doing mascot duty during the games,” Heejin says smugly. “Amongst other privileges.” (Mainly getting to interact with Hyunjin without her knowing who she is. It’s great.)

“Interacting with Hyunjin Kim without her knowing who you are?” Jungeun says. She presses her paintbrush a tad too hard into the canvas, smudging the baby’s breath. “I’ll be having a little _chat_ with Mr Nakamoto later.”

“How’d you know about that?!” 

Jungeun laughs, tapping her temple with the end of her brush. “And don’t think I don’t know you came here to complain about Miss Jo pairing you up with Hyunjin for that egg baby project you have to do. She was raving about it in the teachers’ lounge all recess.”

“But we only had Home Ec last peri—bitch, I knew it was rigged!” Heejin cries, almost knocking over her easel. It wobbles precariously before righting itself. 

Jungeun shrugs. “What can I say, us old hags have nothing better to do than sit around gossiping about our students’ love lives.” She rolls her eyes at Heejin’s aghast look, deadpanning, “I’m kidding. We have tons more important shit to do. Look, it’s just a coincidence you were paired with Hyunjin. There’s no big conspiracy, the teacher Illuminati aren’t out to get you.”

Heejin crosses her arms. “I didn’t say that.”

“And for the record, Haseul’s worked really hard on this project. Trust me, I had to listen to her 2AM agonizings all summer. You guys are gonna enjoy it.”

“Really?” 

“Really,” Jungeun reassures her, “Now, do you wanna hear about the summer soirée or do you wanna spend,” she looks up at the clock on the wall, “the last ten minutes of lunch sulking over a girl?” 

“Sulking over a—”

Jungeun gives her a look.

“Summer soirée,” Heejin mumbles.

 

 

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
hey this is hyunjin! just making sure you got my number

 **from: heejin**  
**to: egg wife ♡**  
it has a 69 and a 420 in it, can’t forget it!!! ur one of the lucky ppl :^)

“Oh my God, why would I say that. She’s gonna think I’m a freak,” Heejin mutters to herself, watching the three dots that indicate Hyunjin’s typing appear and disappear and reappear. She throws her phone onto her bed next to all the French homework she’s been slogging through as she waits for dinner. It dings a second later.

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
never thought about that, you’re so funny!

Heejin sort of - well, she _squeaks_. 

“Heejin!” her mother yells from downstairs, “The Lees are here for dinner! Go answer the door!”

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
i’ll see you tomorrow when we get our egg x

“ _Our_ egg,” Heejin repeats, holding her phone to her chest and kicking her legs up into the air, “ _Kiss_!”

“HEEJIN!”

“Coming!” Heejin puts her phone down, and hurtles out of her bedroom and across the landing, sliding down the bannister like she’s been doing since she was ten, despite having broken her ankle at some point (Chaewon had to cover up all the dicks the boys in Class A drew on her cast with white-out before Heejin went home. Heejin thought they were a bit cute though, in a chibi sort of way because they didn’t have much space to work with.) “Hi, auntie, uncle,” she greets, plastering on a sweet smile when she opens the door. They each give her a quick hug before disappearing into the kitchen to find Heejin’s mom and stepdad. 

Jeno’s hair has gotten even shaggier since Heejin last saw him (two days ago, across the cafeteria). He raises an eyebrow at her. “You look hot,” he drawls, pushing past her into the house.

Heejin looks down. She’s wearing a giant Black Sabbath hoodie that once belonged to her late father and the daggiest pair of pyjama bottoms she could find, having been daydreaming about Hyunjin’s mouth when her mom told her they were having guests and to dress nicely. She shrugs. Nothing Jeno hasn’t seen before. Their moms met in freaking pregnancy yoga when they were both in the womb. 

“Thanks. It’s an outfit to reflect my dark, twisted mind,” Heejin says, following Jeno upstairs. “Dude, school already sucks ass.”

“Tell me about it,” Jeno says, flopping back onto Heejin’s French homework when they enter her bedroom. “You doing that egg baby proj?”

“Duh,” Heejin says. She pulls her desk chair up to the bed, throwing her legs next to Jeno. “Who are you paired with?”

Jeno huffs, bringing his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “This soccer jock called Jaemin. He’s so—” Jeno makes an aborted noise in the back of his throat. “Just look at this.” He takes his phone out of his jean pocket, unlocking it and tossing it to Heejin. 

“ _What are you doing?_ ” Heejin reads, “To which you replied _just studying._ He says, _haha without me?_ sad face, nerd face. Oh God.”

“It gets worse,” Jeno groans.

“ _You’re really adorable. Just so you know, you can call me daddy if you’d like_ , winky face,” Heejin continues, pausing to fake barf for a moment, “Two hours later, _if this project goes well… Do you want to make another baby together?_ Oof, he’s got it bad.” 

“He’s just making fun of me,” Jeno says, leaning up on his elbows. He frowns. “We’ve been in Class B together for two years and he’s never spoken a word to me before this, so.”

“So what? I’m really tired of you spamming my Twitter tee-el at 2AM with ‘I miss Mark Lee so bad’ and ‘when am I gonna get a boyfriend’ and ‘Todoroki, beep my ass’ and—”

“I got it, Heejin,” Jeno cuts her off. He shakes his head. “I don’t know, I just don’t think he’s being seriou—hey! What are you typing?!” 

“Nothing!” Heejin exclaims, rolling her chair back and quickly pressing send on _sure_ before Jeno snatches his phone out of her hand. “It was for your own good! Jaemin Na’s really hot!”

“I hate you, I seriously hate you,” Jeno says, “He’s never gonna leave me alone now.” He narrows his eyes. “Who are _you_ paired up with anyway?”

“No one,” Heejin quickly says, “I’m a single mom.” 

“What?” Jeno pokes at her leg with his foot when she doesn’t reply. “You’re lying, Jeon, who is it?” 

Heejin whistles, staring at the ceiling. 

“Holy shit, it’s Hyunjin, isn’t it?”

Heejin continues whistling.

“You’re _so_ screwed,” Jeno laughs, “How are you going to get anything more than a D for this project when you turn into a stuttering tomato around her?”

“A stuttering tomato,” Heejin repeats, unamused. 

“I said what I said,” Jeno says, grinning.

There’s a shout from downstairs, “Heejin! Jeno! Dinner’s ready!”

“This conversation isn’t over,” Jeno tells Heejin as he hops off her bed.

“Whatever, bitch,” Heejin says, shoving Jeno into the doorframe so she can reach the bannister before him, “I’ve already accepted my fate, anyways!” she yells as she slides down the stairs, “I’m gonna win her over!”

Jeno leans over the railing, holding a palm to his ear. “Huh, what was that? I thought I just heard Heejin Jeon making a joke?”

 

 

Jeno ends up being left behind by his parents when he falls asleep on Heejin’s shoulder in the middle of a Fullmetal Alchemist episode. He gets bridal carried to the spare room by Heejin’s stepdad, snuggling against his broad shoulder, while Heejin follows them with her phone camera out. 

In the morning, she tosses him something of Jaehyun’s when they get ready for school. 

“I look so prep,” Jeno grumbles, fiddling with the collar of his sweater in the full-length mirror next to the front door. He turns, inspecting the leather patch on his elbow. “Ugh. I’d still suck Jaehyun’s dick, even if he is a normie.”

“Shut up, don’t ever speak those words again,” Heejin says, grabbing Jeno’s shoulders and manhandling him through the door. “Bye, mom!”

“Bye, mom!” Jeno echoes, laughing when Heejin pinches his arm. “C’mon, we’re gonna miss the bus.”

They part ways at Class A and B, promising to text each other about how the project goes later. The day is mind-numbingly slow until Home Ec, where Hyunjin is waiting patiently for Heejin, sitting ramrod straight and her expression blank. She smiles when she spots Heejin entering the classroom alongside Chaewon, and the sight of it nearly makes Heejin trip on her own feet. 

“Hey,” Hyunjin says when Heejin slides onto the stool next to her. Chaewon goes to sit next to her partner Yerim, who is also on the soccer team with Hyunjin. “Your hair looks cute.”

Heejin reaches up to fiddle with a strand. “Oh, this?” It’s in its usual wavy mess, but she’d added her lucky butterfly clip just above her ear. “Thank you.”

“Excited to meet our baby today?” Hyunjin asks. 

Heejin smiles, doing her best to mentally will down the blush that is starting to creep up her neck. “The question is, are you ready for parenthood?”

“To be honest,” Hyunjin starts, leaning closer to Heejin with a hand braced on the edge of Heejin’s stool. Heejin sucks in a breath. “Not really. I’m not that great with kids. I’m too… awkward, apparently, I scare them off.” The ends of her hair tickle against Heejin’s thigh. “You’ll have to make up for me, Heejin,” she adds, before pushing back with a grin. 

“I’ll try,” Heejin says weakly, turning her attention to Miss Jo walking in.

They’re given their eggs, Hyunjin picking out a beige one, the shell a little speckled. The rest of the class is spent drawing faces onto the eggs, filling out their birth certificates and building tiny bassinets out of cardboard and pipe cleaner. 

“Hey,” Hyunjin says, as Heejin is in the process of giving their egg baby little pucca buns. She’d positioned the face so that the spots on the shell looked like freckled cheeks. “Don’t you think it sorta looks like Yeojin Im? The girl who does the morning announcements?”

Heejin picks it up, squinting at the face. “Wow, it does,” she laughs, “Should we name it Yeojin?”

“She’ll hate that,” Hyunjin says, stroking her chin. 

Heejin raises an eyebrow at her. 

Hyunjin grins. “You’re right, Heejin. I’ll fill out the birth certificate right now.”

They dub the egg Baby Yeojin, sprinkling a couple drops of blue Gatorade that Hyunjin had leftover from yesterday’s soccer practice onto her head (“It’s holier than normal water!” Hyunjin insists) and placing it gently onto its bed of cotton balls.

“The project ends next Monday,” Miss Jo tells them when class is over, “I expect you all to be spending the majority of your time together taking care of your babies, or scheduling shifts. Your first two journal entries are due on Friday, and the other three on Tuesday so it would be ideal if you and your partner meet up over the weekend.”

Heejin packs up her things, jumping when she feels Hyunjin nudge her shoulder. She has her finger curled around the handle of Baby Yeojin’s bassinet, and Heejin is about to clutch her chest and coo when Hyunjin asks, “Do you wanna go to lunch together?”

Heejin’s eyes widen. “You want to sit with me?”

Hyunjin lifts up the bassinet. “We have to take care of Yeojin,” she says.

“Right,” Heejin breathes, feeling her face start to heat up again, “The project.”

They wait for Chaewon and Yerim to finish up - they named their egg Harry (“After Harry Styles!” Chaewon tells Heejin, “Yerim and I bonded over One Direction. Rest in peace.”) - and Heejin shoots off a text to Jeno:

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
how’d home ec go last period??

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
>:| don’t ask

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
jeno!!!

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
our egg’s called angel. apparently it’s named after me

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
aw ain’t that the darndest thing :^)  
is it a girl or boy name?

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
our baby is genderless. jaemin insisted

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
dad goals :’(

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
shut!!! wbu? is miss jo mopping u up off the floor as we speak?

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
shut [2]!!! she isn’t~ in fact hyunjin invited me to lunch with her~ haha i’m dying inside but it’s fine~ married life is great~

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
oh my god

“Hey, you coming?” Hyunjin asks, a hand on the crook of Heejin’s elbow.

Heejin nearly jumps again, reflexively shoving her phone into her jean pocket and sending up a quick prayer to the Heavens that Hyunjin didn’t see her conversation with Jeno. “Yeah, sorry,” she says, following Hyunjin out of the classroom.

 

 

“You’ll have to hold a gun to my head for me to acknowledge that imposter!” Yeojin’s saying, her cheeks full of nacho chips, like a squirrel storing nuts for the winter. A crumb sprays out of her mouth and lands on Hyunjin’s nose. Heejin shuts her eyes, wincing, but Hyunjin just snorts, flicking it off. “No, I take that back! I’m willing to die! There can only be one Yeojin!”

Hyunjin holds Baby Yeojin up to her cheek, stroking its head. “Yeah, it’ll be our Yeojin.”

Yeojin turns to Heejin, eyes pleading. “You wouldn’t kill me, would you, Heejin? You love me more than that _thing_ , right?”

Heejin looks at Hyunjin, who in turn hams it up, sticking out her bottom lip and pressing her fingertip into Baby Yeojin’s cheek. “I—” God, Heejin is such an awful person. “I’d choose Baby Yeojin over you.” 

Yeojin gasps loudly. She holds onto the edge of the cafeteria table, falling against Chaewon who’d been in deep discussion with Yerim about Ziam (“Larry who? Zayn and Liam were totally in love,” Chaewon insists, when Heejin tries to humour her to avoid talking to Hyunjin). Chaewon glances down at Yeojin, rolls her eyes, and turns to Yerim again.

“Don’t get me wrong, I still love you,” Heejin tries, “You’re my favourite junior!”

“But am I your favourite Yeojin? Am I?” Yeojin cries, “Hope you’re happy in your weird little nuclear fam—” Yeojin cuts herself off, and it seems as though something had dawned on her. A grin slowly forms on her face as she lifts away from Chaewon. She looks between Heejin and Hyunjin. “I see how it is, of _course_ you’d take Hyunjin’s side.”

Heejin shakes her head hurriedly. She reaches under the table to pinch Yeojin’s leg, and Yeojin yelps, shooting Heejin a withering look. 

“What do you mean?” Hyunjin pipes up, to which both Heejin and Yeojin shout, “Nothing!”

“It’s nothing. Yeojin’s just being a little shit,” Heejin tells Hyunjin, pinching Yeojin again.

This seems to placate Hyunjin. She nods solemnly. “We’ll raise our Yeojin better.”

“Of course you will,” Yeojin drawls, winking exaggeratedly at Heejin, until she finally realises what Hyunjin had implied, and she protests, “Hey!”

 

 

After school, Baby Yeojin goes home with Hyunjin with a promise that Hyunjin would write up the first journal entry based on how she takes care of the egg tonight. Heejin’s spending her own evening hunched over her drawing tablet at her desk. She’s taken a break from homework to work on her manhwa collaboration with Jeno - he writes the story, she does the art - that they plan to publish when they go on their graduation trip to South Korea together. It’s about an arranged marriage between the President’s son and the heir to Samsung (they’re still working on a name to get around copyright) and Heejin’s just started on a scene where Haneul has pressed Taehyun against the wall of their apartment, tensions high.

She grabs her phone.

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
wait dude  
who’s gonna bottom?

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
taehyun!!! how many times do i have to tell u to read ALL the dialogue before u start drawing

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
i’m not that good at korean i missed it!!!

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
bs

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
>:|  
ofc taehyun’s the bottom bitch he’s basically ur self-insert

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
SLANDER

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
“make sure to give him an eye smile”

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
eye smiles are common!!!

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
wtvr. better to get dick through my art than none at all right TTT  
this is srsly charity i should get 70% for indulging ur fantasies

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
WE HAVE A WHOLE SUBPLOT ON OMORASHI COS IT T*RNS U ON

 **from: heejin**  
**to: jenotaku**  
yeesh 50/50 it is  
anyway bye ur distracting me

 **from: jenotaku**  
**to: heejin**  
...

Heejin’s halfway through a frame where Haneul tears apart Taehyun’s button down shirt when her phone pings with a text. She sighs, “What do you want, Jeno?” but immediately chokes on her words when it’s from Hyunjin instead.

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
hey heejin [photo attached]

Heejin clicks on the attachment, smiling when she sees Baby Yeojin propped up in an egg cup on Hyunjin’s dining table. There’s a straw placed against its mouth, sticking out of a glass of milk. 

**from: heejin**  
**to: egg wife ♡**  
cute! :’(

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
i was wondering if you and bb yeojin would like to come to my soccer practice tmrw  
if you’re not busy ofc

“What the fuuuuuu—” Heejin says lowly. She quickly switches to her chat with Chaewon.

 **from: heejin**  
**to: mariposa ♡**  
HYUNJIN ASKED ME TO WATCH HER SOCCER PRACTICE TMRW WHAT THE HECK DO I SAY

 **from: mariposa ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
say yes?  
i can come with~ ♡

 **from: heejin**  
**to: mariposa ♡**  
FINE  
oh god

Heejin returns to Hyunjin’s chat.

 **from: heejin**  
**to: egg wife ♡**  
would love to!!  
only busy looking after yeojin  <3

 **from: egg wife ♡**  
**to: heejin**  
ahhhhhhhh  
see you then  >///< <3

“Huh,” Heejin breathes. She picks her stylus up again.

 

 

“We’re looking at a top of 78F today, with clear skies and a light breeze. Make sure you head outside for lunch to soak up some much-needed Vitamin D this hump day!” Yeojin’s voice is rambling through the speakers as Heejin skips through the school hallway to her locker the next day. 

She’s feeling super perky this morning, even managing to fit in breakfast with her mom and stepdad before she headed down to the bus stop. 

(“You’re awake?” her mom gasps, “I feel like I’ve seen a ghost.” She turns to her husband. “Do you see her?”

Heejin’s stepdad makes a show of squinting at Heejin and rubbing his eyes. “I think I do?”

Heejin rolls her eyes, taking a seat at the dining table and grabbing a piece of toast. “A ghost wouldn’t feel as alive as I do,” Heejin says dreamily, her chin in her palm as her mind replays the message she’d received from Hyunjin this morning: _good morning, hope u slept well! me & bb yeojin missed u_, plus a selfie of Hyunjin pulling the ugliest face she’s ever seen on her next to the egg. 

“Heejin,” her mom starts to ask, “Are you and Jeno finally dating?” 

“Oh my God,” Heejin says, pulling a face, “ _God_ , no, but I’m so happy right now that I’m not even gonna bother being disgusted by the thought of that.”

Her mom shrugs. “Thought I’d give it another shot.”)

“And I have Mrs K.O telling me that,” Yeojin continues, as Heejin takes out her books for French and Calc, “Mercury is in retro—retro—”

There’s a loud whisper in the background, “ _Retrograde_ , Yeojin.” 

“Retrograde, that’s the one!” Yeojin exclaims, snapping her fingers. “I think that means shit’s gonna hit the fan - sorry, Mrs K.O! - so stay safe, take care of yourselves. To all you egg parents out there, raising a baby is hard but don’t let the planets ruin your week! Communicate with your partner, have fun doing this hippie crap - love ya, Miss Jo - while you still can with college apps around the corner. On the other hand, Heejin Jeon, your baby can choke. Sorry, _sorry_. This has been Yeojin Im, byeee!” The speakers cut out. 

Heejin laughs to herself, shaking her head, and heads down to AP Calc.

Chaewon’s already waiting for her, blonde hair falling over her eyes as she fills out out her bullet journal. She snaps it shut when Heejin walks past her. 

“What was that?” Heejin asks, slipping into her seat. 

“Just pencilling Olivia into this Sunday,” Chaewon says demurely. “Do you want to come to my place too? She’s bringing _you know what_.” 

Heejin leans in, beckoning Chaewon closer. “The strap?”

“ _Heejin_!”

 

 

“I don’t get why you take such glee in making fun of me,” Chaewon’s saying outside Class B’s homeroom as they wait for Jeno to finish up so they can head down to the soccer pitch, “It’s not like I tease you about your crush on Hyunjin.” Chaewon gets an evil glint in her eye. “And trust me, I’ve got material.”

“You’re such an easy target, I can’t help myself!” Heejin says, as she touches up the blush on Baby Yeojin’s cheeks. Hyunjin had come to their table for lunch again and passed Yeojin onto Heejin for the rest of the day. Then she’d sat down next to Heejin and stared longingly at her croissant until Heejin got the message and gave half of it to Hyunjin, heart lurching in her chest at Hyunjin’s happy face. “Plus, in the four years I’ve known you, you’ve never been into anyone.”

“You just never noticed,” Chaewon says. 

“I—” Heejin gapes, a guilty flush crawling up her chest. Students are starting to bundle out of Class B. As Olivia walks past and gives Chaewon a shy smile, Heejin whispers, “Who’d you like?”

Chaewon just looks at her, a wry expression on her face. After a long torturous minute, she grins and says, “No one, I just wanted to see you squirm.” 

Heejin pouts. “I probably deserved that.” 

“I don’t know what happened,” comes Jeno’s voice, “but you probably did.” He hoists his backpack up his shoulders, his fist enclosed around his and Jaemin’s egg. “Ready to go?”

“You’re gonna accidentally crush Angel,” Heejin tells him as they make their way to the soccer pitch. They pick a spot in the middle of the bleachers and wait for the team to start making their way onto the field.

“That’s the point,” Jeno says darkly.

“You’ll fail,” Chaewon pipes up, primly taking her seat, her tote bag open at her feet with Harry’s bassinet placed inside. She pulls her bullet journal into her lap, effectively meaning that won’t be paying attention to anything else.

“And it’ll be worth it,” Jeno replies. Jaemin spots them in the bleachers and he tugs at Hyunjin’s wrist to point them out to her. Where Hyunjin simply waves at them, Jaemin blows kiss after kiss at Jeno. Jeno bats them all away, Heejin and Chaewon in fits of laughter next to him. “This isn’t funny,” Jeno seethes, “He’s wearing me down. I’m starting to _feel_ things.”

Heejin snorts. “What kinda things?”

“Nothing I can say in front of our children,” Jeno says, sweeping his bangs out of his eyes (so he can properly watch Jaemin do laps around the pitch, Heejin surmises).

The soccer team is co-ed now, with Hyunjin its star striker and captain. The previous coach retired soon after Heejin met Hyunjin for the first time and was replaced by the younger, more progressive Yuta Nakamoto, whom Jaehyun tried to hook up the entirety of his senior year (it didn’t work. Mr Nakamoto has standards. At least that’s what Heejin told Jaehyun when he whined about it, and he hit her back with, “Well at least I’m not a gigantic nerd with a Napoleon Dynamite haircut,” and Heejin ran to her room and sobbed into her pillow). 

Hyunjin was the first girl to be placed on the team and Jaehyun took her under his wing, threatening any male player who so much as looked at her wrong. It was actually Heejin who convinced Jaehyun to start a campaign to make the soccer team co-ed, but Hyunjin’s never found out about that, Heejin swearing Jaehyun to secrecy after he spent a full 24 hours teasing Heejin about her very first gay crush (it was actually Katara from Avatar the Last Airbender, but whatevs). 

Heejin spent that year waiting in the bleachers after school, watching Hyunjin grow stronger, more confident, and when Jaehyun graduated, she got herself hired as school mascot so she had another excuse to keep watching Hyunjin in her element. She’s had a lot of practice Hyunjin-watching.

So why does it feel so novel now, to be sitting here, eyes following Hyunjin move nimbly across the pitch, ponytail whipping back and forth? Is it because Hyunjin knows she’s there? That she asked her to be there? That when she scores a goal she immediately looks up at Heejin, like she’s making sure Heejin saw it?

“Feels like we’re the WAGs club,” Jeno says, voicing what Heejin had been too afraid to conclude. 

“I wish,” Heejin murmurs. Her face grows warm thinking about it: being Hyunjin’s girlfriend, waiting for her after practice, going home together to study but really making out on Heejin’s bed, Hyunjin giving Heejin her spare jersey, Heejin wearing it to a game, _01 KIM_ emblazoned across the back so everyone knows who Heejin belongs to, cheering obnoxiously every time she scores, running up to her after, and Hyunjin, all sweaty, picking Heejin up and kissing her—

Jeno snaps his fingers in front of Heejin’s face. “Hello? Heejin? You in there?”

Heejin blinks. “Whaaa—”

“Practice is over,” Jeno tells her. He stands, pulling Heejin up with him. 

Chaewon has already packed her things and is heading down the stairs at an oddly rushed pace. Jeno and Heejin share a look. They follow after her, hiding behind a wall when she turns back, eyebrows furrowed. Jeno startles next to Heejin when a loud growl of an engine suddenly comes from the parking lot, and Heejin quickly tugs Jeno towards the noise to see: Chaewon climbing onto the back of Olivia’s motorcycle, pulling a helmet onto her head. She spots Heejin and Jeno standing at the edge of the parking lot, jaws dropped, and she sends them a shy little wave before sliding her arms around Olivia’s waist.

“Holy fuck,” Heejin breathes. 

“How is Chaewon the coolest out of us three,” Jeno says, “She still plays with her American Girl.” (It’s true. Whenever Chaewon is asked what she wants for her birthday or Christmas, she’ll just send a link to the American Girl online shop. Heejin could honestly buy herself her own doll with how much money she’s given them up until now.)

“Hot stuff!” someone calls out. It’s Jaemin, making his way over to them after bursting through the backdoor to the locker room. His hair is damp, a small towel slung around his shoulders, and he smiles brilliantly when he reaches them. “Can I take you home, Jeno?”

Jeno raises an eyebrow at him. 

“I’d offer you a ride too, Heejin,” Jaemin says, eyes slowly straying from Jeno (his lips, specifically) to Heejin. He switches the charming smile on again, though Heejin notes it’d been a lot softer when he was looking at Jeno. Cute. “But Hyunjin would kill me.”

“A good enough reason!” Jeno suddenly announces. He grabs Jaemin’s arm and starts dragging him through the parking lot. He twists back and waves at Heejin, yelling out a _bye!_ before he beelines for Jaemin’s car and deposits Jaemin onto the driver’s side. 

Heejin leans against the wall, dragging her sneaker through the gravel in an infinity loop as the team starts to filter through the door and head home. Heejin would do the same but Jaemin’s words keep echoing through her head: _Hyunjin would kill me_. So she stays, heart pounding in her chest when her thoughts start to morph back into her earlier daydream, the one where she’s dating Hyunjin. “Baby Yeojin,” she whispers, holding the egg up, “I’m really losing it. Should’ve killed myself when I had the chance.”

After Mr Nakamoto, Hyunjin is the last one out, changed into a band tee and a pair of athletic leggings that make her butt look _amaze_. Not that Heejin is looking. Hyunjin scans the parking lot for a good minute before turning around, her face crestfallen, and seeing Heejin waiting behind her, having been too nervous to call out to her.

Hyunjin lights up. “Hi. You waited.”

“Uh huh,” Heejin says. She pushes off the wall, wringing her hands. “I - well, I was planning to walk to the Starbucks nearby to study for my French test.”

“Yeah?” Hyunjin presses.

Heejin hadn’t been planning on saying anything else but Hyunjin looks at her expectantly. Oh? _Oh_. “Would you like to come with me?”

Hyunjin nods. Her grin stretches even wider, flashing her canines, sharp as a vampire’s.

 

 

“I hope you weren’t bored,” Hyunjin tells Heejin. The sidewalk isn’t that narrow but their arms brush against each other every so often, making Heejin feel all tingly inside. “The games are definitely a lot more fun.”

“I wasn’t bored,” Heejin reassures her. She scrambles for something else to say but comes up short, and so they walk in silence for a bit. While she looks for a table for them, Hyunjin slips away to the counter before Heejin can even protest and orders at the speed of light.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that,” Hyunjin laughs, stuffing the receipt in her pocket as she makes her way to where Heejin’s pouting at the tabletop. “It’s not a big deal. I _am_ hijacking your study time by being here with you, so lemme make it up to you.”

Heejin frowns even deeper, turning away from Hyunjin when she tries to reach out to touch her arm. “Starbucks is expensive as fuck,” she mumbles, and Hyunjin laughs even harder. A moment later, Hyunjin’s name is called out and Heejin springs up, pushing past Hyunjin to get the order: two coffees and a slice of banana bread.

“Thanks, Heejin,” Hyunjin says when Heejin sits across from her again. She grabs one of the forks and the iced americano, drinking down a quarter of it in one gulp.

Heejin picks up the caramel frappuccino, staring dubiously into its creamy depths. “So, this one’s for me?” she asks.

“Yeah!” Hyunjin says, through a mouthful of banana bread. “I figured you’d like something sweet! ‘Cause you’re—” she cuts herself off, stuffing another piece of bread into her mouth.

“I’m what?” Heejin says, smiling around the straw. She takes a sip of the drink and has to stop herself from visibly wincing at the cloying taste. Her usual order is more along the lines of a black coffee, no sugar, but Hyunjin doesn't need to know that right now.

“Well, you’re sweet,” Hyunjin mumbles, “Do you like it?”

“Yup!” Heejin says, giving Hyunjin a thumb’s up as she wipes whipped cream from the corner of her mouth. “Thank you for buying it for me. And for keeping me company. And for, um—” Heejin twirls a strand of hair around her finger nervously, “—calling me sweet.”

Hyunjin shakes her head, eyes looking at a spot over Heejin’s shoulder. She seems to recover after a second, grinning mischievously at Heejin. “Hey,” she says, poking Heejin’s leg under the table, “Wanna see how many ice cubes I can hold in my mouth? My bet’s on 20.”

Heejin laughs. She shoves her French book back into her bag, and starts counting.

 

 

Jungeun seems weirdly subdued during art the next day, her hair pulled back into a ponytail when she usually wears it down, letting it take a life of its own. But Heejin doesn’t have a chance to question her until after class, embarrassingly distracted by Hyunjin using the easel next to her. 

“I had fun yesterday,” Hyunjin whispers, eyes darting to where Jungeun is slumped in her armchair, legs propped up on her desk, and barking an insult at the closest kid to her (Chaewon, and Jungeun says her attempt at _The Starry Night_ is what would result if Hulk finger painted with an egg yolk. “That’s very creative, Miss,” Chaewon replies delicately.) “I don’t think I’ve ever told you before but your art’s really nice.” Hyunjin gestures at Heejin’s _The Creation of Adam_. “You’re really talented.”

“Thanks,” Heejin says. She looks at Hyunjin’s canvas in the hopes of complimenting her too, but all she finds is a blob of orange in the centre, and a hastily swiped purple stick figure. “Wow, art,” she laughs.

“Shut up,” Hyunjin whines, pushing Heejin’s arm.

When class is over, Hyunjin takes Baby Yeojin to lunch and Heejin hangs back, flopping into the armchair in front of Jungeun’s desk. 

“What do you want?” Jungeun sighs. She dips below her desk to take out a haphazardly wrapped sandwich from her bag. 

“I just wanna know what’s wrong,” Heejin says, pouting.

“Are you my therapist?”

“Let’s just say I owe you one,” Heejin persists, “C’mon, Mrs K.O, tell me what’s up.” Okay, Heejin is a little nosy but Jungeun does seem really sad and she doesn’t want her favourite teacher to be sad. 

Jungeun sighs again, taking a woeful bite of her sandwich (lettuce and… butter?). “I haven’t seen my wife in over two months,” she slowly divulges.

Heejin gasps. “You’re getting a divorce?”

“What, _no_?!” Jungeun sputters, “She’s just been off in England for business.”

“Oh. Right. Thank God you haven’t split up, you guys are like, my OTP,” Heejin says. She bumps her chest and throws up a peace sign. “Best Lesbians Ever.”

“OTP? I don’t know what that means,” Jungeun says. She immediately holds up her finger when Heejin opens her mouth to explain, and shoves the rest of her sandwich into her mouth before continuing, “I don’t know, I - we’ve been fighting so much this past week. Over dumb shit like whether it’s a good idea for us to adopt goldfish when she comes back or the Buzzfeed quizzes she’s sent me that I keep forgetting to take. I’m afraid it’s going to make the distance even worse.” Jungeun faceplants into her desk, and Heejin makes out a muffled, “I miss her so much.”

“There, there,” Heejin says, gently patting Jungeun’s hand. “You and Jinsol will make up very soon. Haven’t you heard? Mercury’s in retrograde right now.”

A pause.

Jungeun huffs. “I didn’t think of that.”

“See? You should really pay me, I’d make a great therapist,” Heejin says proudly. Her phone dings in her pocket and she fishes it out, glancing at the message preview from Jeno: _COME TO COURTYARD ASAP!!!!!!!!!_

“Sure you would,” Jungeun says, sitting up. “Now get out of here, I’m about to start crying and you really don’t need to see that.”

Heejin accepts the dismissal, dashing down the corridor to the school courtyard. There’s a crowd of students gathered around - Heejin stands on her tiptoes but she can’t see anything. Hyunjin however is somewhere near the front so Heejin squeezes her way through and wraps a hand around Hyunjin’s wrist. Hyunjin barely flinches, twisting around to smile at Heejin. 

“What’s going on?” Heejin asks.

“Jaemin and Jeno are getting married,” Hyunjin says, gesturing to where Yerim is fussing over Jaemin’s hair, threading tiny daisies in the caramel strands.

“There you are, Heejin,” Jeno interjects, stomping over to pull Heejin out of the crowd and back to the corridor again. His hair is slicked back and though his glasses have been tucked away, he doesn’t seem to be wearing contacts. He squints at Heejin’s face. “You have to be my best man.”

“This isn’t how I pictured being asked that, but okay,” Heejin says, “Why are you getting married?”

“Jaemin thought it would be distasteful to raise a baby out of wedlock,” Jeno explains, straightening the blazer he definitely wasn’t wearing this morning. 

“What the fuck?”

“I think he just wanted an excuse to embarrass me in front of the whole school,” Jeno says. 

Heejin laughs. “Or he wanted an excuse to confess to you in front of the whole school. Can you try to be a little more romantic?”

Jeno frowns, and says quietly, “I just don’t want to get my hopes up.”

“Aw, _Jeno_ ,” Heejin coos, tugging Jeno into a hug. “If he breaks your heart, I’ll beat him up, okay?”

“Thanks,” Jeno mumbles. He pulls back, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Let’s go.”

The students part as Heejin and Jeno walk in, a collective hum of _Here Comes the Bride_ started up by Yeojin, and Jaemin turns to look at Jeno, wearing the dopiest most lovestruck smile Heejin has ever seen on anyone. Yeojin acts as the celebrant, giving a long-winded and rousing speech on love and family with ten too many references to 13 Reasons Why and when finally Yerim brings over the rings with Angel held in her palm, and Jaemin and Jeno say ‘I do’, lunch is over. They kiss to the school bell. 

Heejin walks away once Jaemin slips his tongue into Jeno’s mouth, after a whispered _I really really like you_ , and finds Hyunjin waiting for her.

“That could be us,” Hyunjin says, grabbing Heejin’s hand with her free one, Baby Yeojin in the other.

Heejin glances down, feeling warmth fill her from head to toe. “Really?”

Hyunjin hums. “Maybe when we’ve graduated high school.”

“Maybe,” Heejin breathes, nodding dizzily when Hyunjin asks if she can walk her to class, letting herself be whisked away.

 

 

Like Miss Jo had instructed, Hyunjin comes over Heejin’s house on Saturday morning. She brings a Monopoly board, and Heejin’s _really_ glad she vacuumed because Hyunjin sinks cross-legged onto Heejin’s rug as soon as she enters the room. Baby Yeojin is sitting in its cup as they play, Heejin with the Scottie dog and Hyunjin with the thimble.

“Are you hungry?” Heejin asks, stretching out on the floor and making her Scottie dog bounce up and down on its spot in jail. 

“I know what you’re trying to do and I won’t fall for it,” Hyunjin accuses, shaking a fifty dollar bill at Heejin. She tosses the dice at Heejin and Heejin squeals, rolling away to avoid it. 

“I’m innocent!” Heejin insists. Her shirt’s ridden up with the movement and she draws it down. Hyunjin’s eyes follow her fingers, and Heejin feels her guts churn like a volcano. She clears her throat. “I swear, I wanted to know if you’d like to make pasta with me. It’s like, the only dish I know how to make.” 

“Can’t even boil an egg?” Hyunjin says.

Heejin makes a horrified noise, stretching forward to place her fingers around Baby Yeojin’s sides. “I would _never_.”

“Promise you won’t steal my money while we’re gone?” Hyunjin asks, with a dubious twist of her mouth. 

Heejin holds out her pinkie, and Hyunjin wraps her own around it. “I had my fingers crossed,” Heejin whispers when they make their way to the kitchen, yelping when Hyunjin makes to push her down the staircase. 

“I’m really competitive,” Hyunjin says matter-of-factly. 

“But are you any good, is the real question,” Heejin teases, rounding the kitchen. Hyunjin huffs, perching herself on the counter as Heejin takes out the ingredients for pasta. She backtracks, “I’m just kidding. I’ve seen you play, you’re incredible.”

“I didn’t think your field of vision was that great,” Hyunjin says. She grins, taking the can of diced tomatoes Heejin is struggling to open out of her hands, popping the tab, and handing it back.

“What do you mean?” Heejin asks, bracing herself against the edge of the counter so she doesn’t like, _swoon_. 

“Under the mascot costume,” Hyunjin says.

Heejin’s heart plummets to her toes. Her mouth twitches in an awkward smile as she breathes, “What?”

“Your dance routine is so cute,” Hyunjin says, “I remember you told me you came up with it yourself.”

So Hyunjin knew it was her all along. Wow, Heejin does _not_ rate Mr Nakamoto. “That’s a lie, it was actually Chaewon. She’s good at aegyo and shit,” Heejin mumbles. She remembers Hyunjin jogging over to her after a match, shirt clinging to her damp, flushed skin. She’d smiled as she told Heejin she liked her choreography, and Heejin had wanted to throw off her giant cat head and kiss the fat underneath Hyunjin’s eyes. 

“So you were trying to impress me?” Hyunjin says, nudging Heejin’s hip with her foot. 

Heejin’s mouth presses into a tight line, hot blood snaking up her neck. She snatches the knife back and begins to slice the onion vigorously. 

“Cat got your tongue, Heejin?” Hyunjin sing-songs, tickling her toes even harder into Heejin’s leg. 

Heejin dabs the stinging in her eyes with her sleeve, scowling at Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin laughs, reaching over to wipe away the one tear that hightails it down Heejin’s cheek. “Sorry I made you cry,” she says.

“The onion made me cry,” Heejin sniffs. She tilts her head up and blinks in succession. 

“Square up, onion,” Hyunjin snarls at the chopping board, holding up her fists. “No one makes my baby mommy cry.”

Heejin’s head snaps back down. She sputters, and Hyunjin lowers her hands, looking a little sheepish.

They go back to making the pasta.

 

 

It’s been a while since Heejin has been in Chaewon’s room but it’s exactly how she remembers it: walls painted a creamish pink, her American Girl merch arranged neatly on her poster bed, her desk stocked with pens in every colour of the rainbow. It’s a bedroom fit for a princess, so Heejin is in fits of laughter seeing Chaewon perched on her window seat in what Heejin calls her Victorian ghost pyjamas, licking the edge of a joint. Olivia is sitting on the floor between Chaewon’s legs, and she looks simultaneously perplexed and unamused by Heejin’s glee.

“How are you so good at that?” Heejin marvels, rolling into her back and clutching her stomach when she’s overcome by another wave of laughter. “Oh my God, I’ve got abs.”

“It’s called practice, Heejin,” Chaewon says drily, looping her arms around Olivia’s shoulder and leaning down so that Olivia can light the joint up. 

“You can try first,” Olivia tells Heejin, and there’s a reedy quality to her voice Heejin never really expects, and when Heejin looks even closer, an awkwardness in her eyes even when she’s smiling. Like she’s permanently on the verge of crying. 

“Awww,” Heejin coos, stretching forward to pluck the joint out of Olivia’s hand. “You look like you could kill me but you’re really just a cinnamon roll, huh?” 

Chaewon snorts, and Olivia’s eyebrows furrow even deeper. Heejin just plants herself back onto the carpet and cocks her wrist, fingers pinched around the joint like she’s seen on Skins, and takes a long clumsy puff. She’d hoped to be smooth about it after seeing how _experienced_ Chaewon is, but Heejin definitely misjudged: she ends up coughing her throat into prolapse practically, and Chaewon rushes downstairs to get her a glass of water while Olivia pats her back. 

“Nevermind, I think you are trying to kill me,” Heejin wheezes. She presses the back of her hand into her forehead, feeling woozy. “Wow, I think I’m high. This is amazing, woooooow.” 

Olivia cracks a smile. “You’re really not. C’mon, I’ll show you how to do it properly.”

Heejin sits ups, clasping her hands in her lap. “Take it away, master, teach me your ways.”

“Never call me that again,” Olivia says, rolling them another joint. The last one is mangled on the carpet like autumn leaves in a gutter, crushed underneath Chaewon’s foot as she ran across the room. 

She _does_ get stoned eventually. If Heejin was a chatterbox before, Heejin 420 is even worse than Miss Jo when she gets excited about candle making, which is to say she only stops talking to fill her lungs with oxygen. It’s around the fourth time Heejin brings up the topic of speciesism against tentacles that Chaewon pulls Heejin up and dumps her on her bed, shoving her phone into her hand. 

“Here,” Chaewon says, “Make some bad decisions. I wanna kiss my girlfriend.”

Heejin pouts, watching Chaewon go back to the window seat and sit on Olivia’s lap. She looks down at Chaewon’s American Girl doll. “Guess it’s just you and me,” she says sadly, “Sorry I don’t know your name, I kinda zone out when Chaewon talks about you. Is it Annabelle? Amethyst? Amber? Annalise - that’s the one.” Heejin unlocks her phone, finger hesitating over the iMessage icon. “What’s the point of being high if I don’t get to make out with someone too… You know, I’ve always heard that orgasms feel crazy good after you’ve smoked weed. Sorry, you’re meant to be a kid, I probably shouldn’t have said that.” Heejin looks at her phone again. “You’re right, though. If I want to make out with someone, I should just _ask_ , right?” 

**from: heejin**  
**to: egg wife ♡**  
hi

Heejin scratches her head, not sure where to go from here. She looks at Annalise for guidance, and its sweet impassive face reminds her of Hyunjin. Heejin’s stomach flips. 

**from: heejin**  
**to: egg wife ♡**  
i rly like@u hyunjin, mahbe i even love u, i wanna be wit u, i want to kiss u and est u out and i want ur mouth on. my tits! crush me with ur jock thighs PLS. luv heejin xoxo

“There,” Heejin says, clicking _send_ on the message, “That should do the trick.”

She waits five minutes for a response that doesn’t come, before she sinks into Chaewon’s fluffy cushions and falls into a deep blissful sleep…

 

 

(“THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU GAVE ME MY PHONE! YOU KNEW I WOULD DO THIS!” Heejin screeches the next morning, her phone face down at the bottom of Chaewon’s staircase after Heejin had accidentally dropped it seeing what she’d sent to Hyunjin.

“How was I meant to know you’d confess to Hyunjin?” Chaewon says, voice calm but her face a little red with frustration. “And I’m using confess very loosely here. I thought you’d just send Jeno nudes like you did last time we got drunk!”

Heejin lets out a scream. “It’s your stupid doll’s fault. It kept talking to me!” She runs back into Chaewon’s bedroom, hissing, “I’m gonna rip its fucking head off.”

“HEEJIN, _NO_ ,” Chaewon cries, chasing after Heejin.)

 

 

The only way Chaewon manages to get Heejin to go to school with her is by agreeing to let her use her expensive Tombow pens for her and Jeno’s manhwa for a month. (“You drive a hard bargain,” Heejin says, standing on Chaewon’s window seat. _With_ her shoes on. “But I’m still willing to jump out of this window at any second.”

Chaewon looks panicked. She sighs, “I’ll also do your Calc homework for a week.”) Heejin’s very keen on skipping homeroom and just hiding in a bathroom stall for the rest of the day, but Mrs K.O catches her trying to sneak into the boys’ and escorts her directly to her class. 

“ _I really like you, Hyunjin, maybe I even love you, I want to be with you_ ,” Jungeun reads as they walk through the hallway, holding Heejin’s phone out and lowering her glasses on her nose, “ _I want to kiss you_. Honestly, it’s not that ba— _and eat you out_. Uhhh, _I want your mouth on my tits. Crush me with your jock thighs, please_. Oh, how polite. _Love Heejin, hugs and kisses_.” 

There’s silence as they pass the computer lab, one of the ninth grade classrooms, the Home Ec room. Finally, Heejin bursts out, “Say something, oh my God, _please_!”

“I—” Jungeun starts, handing Heejin her phone. “I think you should look out for run on sentences.”

“That’s it,” Heejin says, shoving her phone into the pocket of her denim skirt. “Chaewon thought she could stop me, but I’m really killing myself this time.”

“I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think,” Jungeun tries, grimacing a bit. “You kids are wilder than I’d ever care to imagine. Maybe she liked it? Maybe she’ll say yes.” 

Heejin shakes her head. “She didn’t reply.” 

“Well, go and find out,” Jungeun says, stopping abruptly and gesturing at the door of Class A’s homeroom. “Also, can you please pray to Buddha no one heard me reading all of that out loud to you? I actually like my job.”

Heejin lets out a sob, before pushing into the classroom. 

“Heejin!” Hyunjin calls out immediately, waving her over. “I have bad news.”

Heejin’s heart sinks, and she takes a step back. She’s getting rejected in front of her whole class. She didn’t think Hyunjin could be so cruel. 

“Hee _jin_ ,” Hyunjin whines, beckoning even harder. “You have to see this.”

 _What_ , Heejin thinks, _is she trying to bait me?_ She walks over timidly, dumping her bag on her desk on the way. That’s when she sees it.

Hyunjin’s hands are huddled around what appears to be the remains of Baby Yeojin. There’s a large shard that shows one of her eyes and a pucca bun. Heejin’s hand covers her mouth in horror.

“H-how did this happen?” she asks. 

“Well,” Hyunjin starts, looking up at Heejin with these large sad puppy dog eyes. “When I got your texts, I was in the kitchen. And uh, I dropped Baby Yeojin on the tiles.”

“Oh God,” Heejin mutters, pacing around Hyunjin’s desk. “Holy shit. I’m so sorry. Oh my God, I was totally stoned when I sent those. I’m _so_ sorry. I freaked you out and I killed our child. I deserve to go to jail.”

Hyunjin holds Heejin’s wrist, stopping her short. “Calm down, Heejin, it’s okay. We’ll just hold a funeral for her at recess. That’s what responsible parents would do, so we won’t even fail. And you didn’t freak me out.”

“I didn’t?” Heejin asks.

Hyunjin grins. “You didn’t.” The bell rings.

 

 

They hold a service in the school yard, next to the flower beds. It’s a small gathering of friends (Chaewon, Jeno, Yerim), spouses of friends (Olivia, Jaemin) and semi-peaceful protesters (Yeojin). 

“Just so you know,” Yeojin whispers loudly to Heejin, as they all watch Hyunjin kneel onto the dirt and begin to dig a burial plot. “I may have hated your imposter baby, but I’m seriously offended that you killed her. Any child named after me should live a healthy well-rounded life and die peacefully in their sleep at the age of 100.”

“I didn’t kill her, Hyunjin did,” Heejin whispers back. Chaewon twitches next to her, the only other person aside from Hyunjin to know the sordid details behind Baby Yeojin’s death. “Also didn’t you curse my baby last Thursday?” 

Yeojin shrugs. “My gut is telling me to blame you. I _will_ find out why.”

Hyunjin barks out a laugh, cutting herself off just as quick. “Heejin, can you come help me with this?” she calls out quietly. 

Heejin squats down next to Hyunjin, not wanting to get her knees dirty, and together they lower Baby Yeojin’s tissue-wrapped shards into the ground. 

They say a quick prayer. Everyone places a flower atop Baby Yeojin’s grave (except for Yeojin, who rests a snail she found somewhere on top of the flowers), lips quivering in an attempt not to laugh as they give Hyunjin and Heejin their condolences. 

When they’ve all wandered off, Hyunjin grabs Heejin’s hand, hoisting her up to her feet. She dusts off her knees with her spare hand, still holding onto Heejin’s. “Now that that’s over,” Hyunjin says, “Do you wanna skip art and make out in the bathroom?”

Heejin gives her a dubious look, and Hyunjin squeezes her hand, mouthing, _I like you too._

“Yeah,” Heejin says, beaming. “I do.”

 

 

(Hyunjin slots one of her thighs between Heejin’s legs, Heejin’s skirt hiking up a little, and shoves her even harder into the bathroom wall. Heejin’s a tiptoe away from lifting off the ground and she holds onto Hyunjin’s shoulders like they’re a buoy protecting her against an ocean wave. They’d kissed sweetly at first, they really tried. But the second Hyunjin’s fingers inadvertently pressed into Heejin’s bladder (okay, so she drank a litre of water on the way to school to stop herself from having a nervous breakdown) Heejin had let out this humiliating whimper. Hyunjin pulled back, pupils dilating so manically Heejin was almost worried, and then dove back in, crashing her lips against Heejin’s again. 

They kiss, rough and frantic and too _too_ hot. 

A loud cheer from the outside interrupts them. They pause, but don’t stop. Then there’s another, and a whole chorus of them, and someone yells out, “What the fuck, Mrs K.O’s wife just jumped out of the airplane! That English bitch crazy!”

Heejin and Hyunjin share a look, and rush over to the window above the toilet. In the sky are the words _Marry me?_ written in smoke (Heejin later finds out from Jungeun that it was the only thing the pilot knew how to write), an airplane circling overhead and to their disbelief, Jinsol Oakley floating down to the ground in a parachute, her platinum blonde braid unmistakeable. 

Hyunjin shoulders open the window and they squeeze together, peering down to watch Jinsol land. Jungeun runs up to her, not even waiting for Jinsol to get rid of the parachute before she’s pulling her in for a kiss. 

“How _romantic_ ,” Heejin cries, clutching Hyunjin’s arm. 

“Don’t expect me to do that for you,” Hyunjin says. Below, Jinsol tries spinning Jungeun around, only to trip on the parachute and end up in a heap on the ground. She pretends to shudder. “Way too public.”

Heejin tilts her head, watching the airplane shoot away, making the words scatter in the air. “And probably way too expensive,” she adds. She drops back down to the ground, paling at the loud _slosh_ her stomach makes. She pushes Hyunjin to face the door. “Okay, now I really have to pee.”)

**Author's Note:**

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